Monthly Archives: September 2025

Inner Buffoonery: Send In the Clowns

Posted by colettekelso in Expression and tagged with , , , , , ,

Listening to a conversation about American politics—ironically, in a nondual discussion group—suddenly it seemed so clear: the cartoon version of the American president was/is the same buffoon running the show in our own minds. The David Bohm rendition of “…’my’ thought is part of the system. It has the same fault as the fault I’m trying to look at.” The figure out there, idolized or despised, is nothing more than the inner buffoon—the one who insists it’s right, who pretends to rule, who I mistake myself for–the fake-tan, blustering caricature within.

This is always the case. Projection, as a shield against the truth of our own inauthenticity.

“Send in the clowns” is a theatric term, used when the play has collapsed: distract the crowd, cover the disaster with laughter. The clowns arrive because the show is already broken.

So—who’s your daddy?

“Thought creates the world and then says, ‘I didn’t do it.’” ~ David Bohm

“You’re on earth. There’s no cure for that.” ~ Samuel Beckett

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It’s Always Something, Out of Nothing

Posted by colettekelso in Expression, now and tagged with , , , , , , , ,

Creatio ex nihilo—creation out of nothing. Usually reserved for gods and cosmology, but isn’t that what we’re all doing, all the time? A full-scale, 24/7 TV show plays in my head with no studio, no cameras, no past recordings. Just appearances, arising out of nowhere. You can’t help but watch. Where’d that come from?

We call some images in our head “memories,” as if they prove a past. But what about them actually says past? They show up now, the way food appears when you open the fridge: some things are there, some things aren’t. That’s all. You couldn’t list everything until you look. And when you do, it’s immediate, not historical. Milk, or no milk.

What did you do today? Got fired, fell in love, felt sick? Out of nowhere, it arrived. Out of nowhere, it passed. Always something out of nothing. Always.

“Life might just be an absurd, even crude, chain of events and nothing more.”
—Haruki Murakami

“Time is too conceptual. Not that it stops us from filling it in. So much so, we can’t even tell whether our experiences belong to time or to the world of physical things.” — Haruki Murakami

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Grok the Glitch: Absurdity IS the Drift

Posted by colettekelso in Expression and tagged with , , , , , , , , , ,

Here’s a reprieve: realizing the world is absurd isn’t just a shake-my-head and chuckle phrase. We pretend the play is coherent, the stage is solid, and the director is in charge. And then—the seams show. Once you’ve seen them, you can’t unsee. You want to squeak: “Guys… the emperor has no pants, the luggage carousel is a metaphor…”

Comic relief and bewilderment are valid ways the absurd breaks through. When something goes wrong, everyone automatically scrambles for an explanation: “It’s his fault,” “it’s Mercury retrograde.” Explanations are soothing, sure. But here’s the spoiler: life doesn’t make sense. It never did. It shows up as nonsense, and we make every effort to clean it up. We just pretend not to notice—because, well, work and the gym.

Maybe you’ve noticed. Maybe you’ve seen the seams in the sky. Maybe it hit you in traffic, or in a circular argument, or while glaring at a broken printer: wait… this is nonsense. That’s the whole show. Daily wrongness is not an error to be fixed. It is the architecture. Traffic jams. Technology that complicates. The DMV. Coincidences that feel like secret notes from the universe. These aren’t anomalies. They’re evidence. See it clearly—and the headached dissolves into laughter.

“The realization that life is absurd cannot be an end, but only a beginning.” ~ Albert Camus, The Myth of Sisyphus

“Explanation separates us from astonishment, which is the only gateway to the incomprehensible.” ~ Eugène Ionesco

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Do Not Presume to Stand Alone, or You Stand Alone

Posted by colettekelso in love, Relationship and tagged with , , , , , , ,

The belief in separation creates its own evidence. There are those you love and care for. Include yourself in that undivided circle. There is no division between that which you love and that which loves. You move within an Arc of Support. What you hold up, holds you.

“We are all responsible for all, before all, and I more than all the others.”
~ Fyodor Dostoevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

“I am large, I contain multitudes.” ~ Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass

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Perception Is Not Fact

Posted by colettekelso in perception and tagged with , , , , , , ,

Perception isn’t proof of reality. What you see doesn’t tell you what the world is; it shows you what kind of lens you’re looking through. It is an artifact of conditioning, a relic from the past projected outward and mistaken for truth. Whatever you’re experiencing, whatever gives you the most distress in your life—know this: You are a lens, an imaginative limit.

“Perception is a mirror, not a fact. And what I look on is my state of mind, reflected outward.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

“I have given everything I see…all the meaning it has for me.” ~ A Course in Miracles

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